Sunday, December 22, 2013

December 22nd

Okay, so I am feeling optimistic today.  Thinking about fun things to do in the next few years.  Promise I won't be that person to overcome a brain tumor and run a marathon or complete my first Iron Man.  Sorry if you were hoping for that.  

My mind is running places like this:This spring I want to take my boys to the zoo at least twice a week.  Ride the carousel and train every time we go.  Get ice cream from the barn every time.  Let Owen get a stupid wax animal every time because let's be real, that is the real reason he wants to go anyways.

This summer I want to take the boys to the water park just like we did last summer.  I want to sit and watch Jacob do the little tiny slide over and over and over.  I want to order them both a purple slushie and a hot pretzel with the gross cheese that goes with it and call that our lunch so I don't have to make anything to eat before nap time when we get home. 
I want to teach Owen to water ski and/or tube.  I want Jacob to sit nicely on the boat and cheer us on while we try but will be willing to drop him at the pier at his first sign of impatience. 

I want to do one a month date with my amazing husband.  We NEVER get time to ourselves and I already said I wanted to do this before all this tumor drama unfolded, I assume this means we really need to make this a priority. 
I want to sit in our backyard this summer and watch the boys ride all over in their tractors while Jamie and I sit and drink cold beers and laugh at how much they fight. 

I want to stay positive and not let my mind drift to crazy places, or at least not let it drift there too often.  I want to get back to sleeping through the night, and hopefully without needing to become some medicated zombie just to get 6 hours of sleep.

I want to get back behind my camera, capturing amazing photos for families to cherish.  I fear I will just cry every time I have a session.  I hope I can pull my shit together. 
My kids better be ready for to me to photograph THEM even more than I already do!  I LOVE my boys with all my heart and want to capture their adorable little lives.

I want this amazing hair!  Come on...a  girl can dream right, it's even so cute just pulled back in a messy pony tail with her cute glasses (Nicole Curtis, Rehab Addict)

Thank you again to everyone who has been part of our support system thus far.  It's been a big adjustment this past week.  I am NOT a wimp so this has been very strange for me.  I feel like I am trapped in someone else's body.  It's very tiring for me to even be awake for more than 3 or 4 hours.  I over analyze EVERY little thing I feel about my body.  A headache or tingle in my arm would have never made me think twice before and now I lay there questioning if I am dying.  I GOT THIS.  This tumor will not beat me down.  The positive attitude that I have had for the past 31 years will shine WAY brighter than this weak little tumor inside me. 




9 comments:

  1. I just googled "Rehab Addict." Nicole has a new viewer and a new fan girl of her hair. Good looking out Alison! Sending love and strength from Texas!

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    1. Megan - I thought you might like her style too! Love her hair and quirky style. You already have some pretty fierce style yourself. I am still rocking comfy sweats and unwashed post operative hair that hasn't been shampooed for 10 days!!!! All I want for Christmas is to WASH my hair!

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  2. You SO got this! If anyone can jump this hurdle it is you! You, the boys and Jamie are an unstoppable team! I have no doubt that you'll get to check everything off your 2014 list.

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    1. Thanks Abi! Don't know what I would do without the strong group of love and support behind me!

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  4. Allison, I went through the same thing this past October. You are in our prayers. You are a figher and you are right, YOU GOT THIS! Do something fun with your hair, those glue and little shaving areas are annoying!! I did a warrior hair cut!! LOL

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  5. Susane - Thank you for the encouragement! WE got this! I am anxious to get at my hair! Still have the staples and haven't washed it yet. I can barely stand to touch it. Praying we are able to get in today or tomorrow to get the staples out before Christmas but it's not looking likely. Oh well, greasy hair for the holidays it is!

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  6. Oh my goodness. I had no idea... prayers prayers prayers

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  7. HEY Alison, Can't you just here us yelling that!!!! If you need extra markers to start checking everything off that 2014 list I have an entire box for you! I'm sure you will be needing them. That is a great list... now we just have to get rid of -20 temperatures...... But I'm not asking God for that right now... I have other more important requests up there. Love you will all my heart. Keep jumping those hurdles. Remember YOU ARE STRONG, YOU ARE DETERMINED, YOU ARE STUBBORN AS ALL HELL...... AND YOU ARE LOVED BY MANY!!! XXXXXOOOOO

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